The 7 new rules of Indian arranged marriages

28, female, smart, b’ful, tall, Delhi. That’s the print version of a/s/l in Yahoo! chatrooms – the matrimonial columns. The wedding business has taken over the Internet from shaadi dot com to kundli dot com and finally an album of 400 wedding plus honeymoon pictures on facebook dot com. Indian arranged marriages are not the same as they used to be 10 years ago. With nuclear families and lesser saas-bahu drama, there are new rules that you must know.

Rule 1: Stop being scared of the ‘S’ word: Stuck in the friend zone and not keen on meeting the prospective partner? Let’s get real; you will eventually get married after your parents are hell bent upon it.

It’s completely okay to go and meet the one your parents have zeroed in on. This could be the beginning of the next best phase of your life.

Rule 2: No judging the partner’s past. He may have dated several women in the past, that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll continue doing that after you’re married. She may have dated several men in the past, that doesn’t give you the authority to judge her character. It only means they’re all in touch with their emotional side and know what love and relationships are all about.

Rule 3: Don’t axe the ex.

Jealous of their ex-es commenting and liking their pictures on Facebook? There must be a reason why he/she is not together with that ex anymore. Give them the benefit of doubt because they could really be just good friends. A little bit of jealousy is good for the relationship anyway!

Rule 4: Date for as long as you want. There’s no hurry to settle down. Let’s be honest, we don’t even know what settling down is today. Hopping from one job to another every other year, strike that word out of your list. Keep dating and somewhere in due course of time you’ll know whether to take the plunge or not. If it’s a yes, nothing like it. If it’s a no, move on!

Rule 5: Careers are important. The unwritten rule where the woman has to move to her prospective groom’s location of work is gradually taking a u-turn. A lot of men are willing to move to their partner’s city.

Rule 6: Boys, you’re not getting any ‘gifts’. Deal with it, the girl’s family has already spent lakhs on her education and she probably has a better job compared to his. Boys have started to detest the ‘d’ word (yes, dowry) more strongly because their 2BHK in another city is not big enough and they’re both going to have enough moolah in the bank to spend on themselves.

Rule 7: Parents must be respected. From primary school till date we have been reminded time and again how parents must be respected. They’ve shaped us into young, confident and responsible adults and mutual respect for each other’s parents should be extremely important when you’ve decided to tie to the knot.

And that’s how you can live happily ever after!